The idea of following intuition is attractive yet perplexing to me. What does it actually mean to follow our intuition and feelings? Does it mean throwing thinking out all together? I think most people mean lead with feeling and intuition and the logic will come later. But as someone who has experienced strong emotions such as anxiety and depression, sometimes feelings can be overwhelming and if I lead with feeling, I end up in an uncomfortable, unproductive place for a while. We can also have conflicting feelings about people we love, wanting them in our lives but also wanting distance. Logic does not allow room for these hypocrisies, but feelings do. So how do we navigate the world of feelings and thoughts? Should we stay true to the illogical, confusing landscape of our feelings or should we cut through life with the scalpel of logic?
I sometimes have periods when I test out only listening to feelings. Life can get pretty boring and one dimensional at times if I do that. I follow a feeling for what seems like forever. Life begin to lose it’s meaning, so I think some of life’s meaning has to do with the logical and thought component. It seems like we need both and both need to be expressed. Our conscious mind begs for release and our emotional mind also needs the same expression. It won’t always make sense, but that is part of being human. You don’t have to be too harsh on yourself on not following one or the other to a T.
That is the state of consciousness we have as humans. At least what I have experienced for mine so far. I sometimes critisize myself when I don’t follow through with something, but perhaps it was the way it was meant to be. Our natural state is a distracted mishmash of emotions and thought. Sometimes a thought has a stronger pull than an emotion and vice versa. Like when depression or another emotion is taking over, it helps to have thought step in, and sometimes when we get tied up with thought and its limitations, we let emotion take over. Don’t be too hard on yourself when this happens and your general flakiness. It is natural.
To know that we are illogical and logical, perhaps that is a relief. Does it move human beings forward in development to realize this? Maybe not. But it might make us more at peace with ourselves and allow us to live authentically.
We are attracted yet repelled by certain things. That is our nature. All we can do is observe and not take anything emotion or thought too seriously.
I often scold myself for being hyporitical but we need both to live, feeling and thought. Thought can only take us so far and feeling can only take us so far. It is not balancing but it is understanding we are both. An ebb and flow.
I was reading “Mating in Captivity” by Esther Perel and she refers to this same concept when talking about relationships. “You can’t schoose between inhaling and exhaling. The tension between security and adventure is a paradox to manage not a problem to solve. You need each at different times.”